Hi! This is something I wrote last year, I kind of like the language in this one, and because it's pretty different to the other stuff I've put on here lately. It's something which I think could be quite good to develop because of the nature of the characters and the scope for parallel narratives. Anyway, I hope you like this piece, it's not like my usual, but it's okay :)
‘I really do love you, you know.’ He wasn’t sure if
he’d intended to say this aloud, but oddly, he didn’t regret saying it.
‘I know, Tom’ She
didn’t look at him, he was glad about this. Somehow, it would hurt more if she
looked him in the eyes while he was telling her this.
‘It’s just, being
here, when I look at you, it’s like you’re actually glowing, in the way that
angels do, and while this probably isn’t what you want to hear, I need to say
it. When I look down into the water, and I see you next to me, I know I don’t
deserve you. Richard’s lucky to have you, he really is, I hope he knows that.’ She
looked up at him this time and smiled.
‘How long have we
been friends now, Tom? fifteen years? And you’ve been here for me more times
than I can even count, I just feel like if anyone doesn’t deserve anyone, I don’t
deserve you.’ It was true; he’d been as loyal as a dog, following her like a
lost lamb, offering her a shoulder to cry on in the worst of times, and
laughing with her in the best of times.
‘Just so you know
though, your friendship is enough for me.’ There was some truth behind his
words; he did feel lucky to have her friendship, though however hard he tried,
he couldn’t convince himself that it was enough. He looked to the snowy ground
beneath their feet. This forest had heard some of their deepest, most
heart-felt discussions, it had watched them play through summers, seen them
grow together. It had witnessed that kiss they shared once near the lake. Tom
wondered if the trees knew how he felt about Jenna, and whether they wished as
much as he did that she’d feel the same for him. He looked towards the lake
which was now frozen over, the spot where they’d shared such a significant
moment in their lives. The moment he fell in love with her more than he thought
possible.
‘Richard asked me
to marry him.’ He hadn’t seen that coming, mostly because he’d been so absorbed
in the perfection of the past, but partly because they’d only been together for
around six months, and he was under the impression he may still have time to
win her for himself. ‘I said yes.’ In that instant, the whole world
disappeared, falling into itself all around him, he wished it would engulf him;
just take him away from the situation, he’d been so at ease up until that
point, but now he was wounded, it was as though she’d covered a sword in salt
and driven it into his chest, twisting as she went, smiling all the time.
‘Congratulations.
I mean really, wow. When’s the wedding?’ he forced the words out, forced
himself to sound jovial. To him it couldn’t have sounded more false.
‘Next June, well,
this June coming I guess, I can’t believe how quickly this year has gone.’ She
was more animated now, as if by telling him, she’d freed herself of some
disgusting secret.
***
His first
thought, when asked to stand for the bride, was not as he’d expected it would
be. He’d imagined he’d be so overcome with grief at losing her to another man,
one whom he disliked intensely. He was in fact taken over with such a blissful
state of awe at her intense beauty in her ivory dress, sweeping along the ground
behind her, that he could barely breathe. He was sitting near the front of the
church, as she had requested. Throughout the ceremony, he didn’t hear a word,
apart from the customary “If any person here present knows of any reason why
these two people may not legally be joined in holy matrimony, please speak now,
or forever hold your peace.” He looked at the side of her head and shifted in
his seat, he could have sworn he saw her head twitch towards him, was this a
warning, or a quiet plea? Did she want to be rescued? He imagined himself the
hero, and Richard the villain, Jenna the damsel in distress. He imagined
swooping in on a rope, vanquishing Richard and cutting the ropes which were
entrapping Jenna with a huge, ruby and diamond handled sword, then riding off
into the sunset on the back of a horse. The moment passed to speak up and he
looked up in time to hear “You may now kiss the bride” and to witness the
eternal loss of his princess.
‘Congratulations,
I’m so pleased for you both, Jenna, you look beautiful.’ Well, it was half true
and that was the best he could do at present. All of the guests were now in the
grand hall of a grand manor house, about to eat grand food, and hear grand
speeches, while drinking grand wine, and toast to the newly married couples’
grand life together. Tom was seated at a table with his, and some of Jenna’s,
close family.
Half way through
the evening, while Tom was standing somewhere on the outskirts of the room,
Jenna’s father stumbled across the room to him. He’d been drinking quite
steadily since dinner and was at a stage of intoxication where he was going to
be honest, but not within earshot of the person he was being honest about.
‘I’ve aaallways liked you, Tom.’
‘Thank you, sir’
‘And I’ve never liked that Richard bloke, bit of a
dick, I remember once, when you were five, saying that one day, when you were
nearly as old as me, you were going to marry our Jenna.’
‘Oh, yes, I’d
forgotten that!’
‘I only wish
things had worked out differently for you, Tom, you’ll always be like a son to
me.’ And with that, he stumbled away, leaving Tom in a state of both shock and
reminiscence. He wished more than anything things had turned out differently
too, but he also knew that he couldn’t change or control who you fall in love
with, or who falls in love with you. Besides, Jenna was happy, so shouldn’t he
be happy for her? He abandoned the rest of his drink, and went to tell the newlyweds
once again, how happy he was for them both.
‘Thanks again for
coming, Tom’
‘It’s no problem,
Jenna, I’ve had a blast, so sorry I couldn’t say goodbye to Richard, extend my thanks
and apologies to him, won’t you?’ she smiled and took his hand in hers, leading
him across the slowly emptying dance floor, towards the exit.
‘Of course’ she
leaned into him and kissed his cheek.
‘Let me know when
you land tomorrow, I don’t care what time it is’
‘Sure I will,
have a safe journey home.’ They exchanged one last smile. He knew that now,
their relationship would never be the same; they’d never walk through their
forest again, past the willow trees, and the lake. ‘HEY!’ it was Jenna shouting
to him from the doorway, framed there like something out of a dream. She ran
across the gravel towards him and almost threw herself into his arms. ‘Don’t
ever forget how much you mean to me, you hear me? Don’t you dare!’ She kissed
his cheek again, for longer this time. Then she let him go. She stood and
watched him disappear into the night, like a candle’s flame extinguishing in a
gentle breeze.
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